The Dream

The Trampoline

No, this is not about living the dream.  This is about the dream that I had approximately one week after learning about the confusing death of a loved one.  While it may mean nothing to someone else, it opened up my eyes to many things, thus the need to document it here.

Many times when I dream it's like watching a short 3 minute movie, sometimes I just observe as if it's being played back later, other times it feels as though I'm living it.  This dream in particular is weird as I only remember snapshots and sort of thinking out loud moments.  In this dream, I was single and owned the home I grew up in as a kid.  The neighbors were not the neighbors from that home but of my Father's current home in a different city.  The home in the dream is in what I consider my hometown and the same place my recently deceased relative lived.  The story here involved a gigantic trampoline in the backyard.  This was no ordinary family sized trampoline, this thing was the size of a four stall garage.  According to the dream, it was the next door neighbor's and was installed on my property before I purchased the home.  For whatever reason I had never used the trampoline as it was theirs even though I had permission.  The day of this dream however, the trampoline and all signs of it were gone.  Nothing but beautiful green grass that had been freshly cut and it smelled wonderful.  I was having a conversation with someone but I don't know whom, I just know that I said  that I was going to have to ask the neighbor if the trampoline was coming back because it hadn't been there for sometime.  I told this person that I didn't want to do anything with the land until I knew for certain.  The person told me that the trampoline hadn't been there for years and they were certain that it was my yard to do anything I wished.  Sometime shortly after that, I woke up.

Now I'm sure that story doesn't mean much to anyone else but me.  However, for me it represents all sorts of things.  There are many parts of that story which line up with places and times of my past and trying to hold onto them.  What it basically means to me though is that for whatever reason, I have been not moving on for years, possibly since I moved away from that little town as a teenager.  I have always felt ties to that little town and the people in it even though I'm sure I have long since been forgotten.  All of my friends moved away shortly after I did and the school was demolished years ago.  What this dream makes clear to me is that it's okay to move on and enjoy what you have, that doesn't mean that you have to forget what was once there nor wait for it to come back.  The truth is that it never will.

What Can We Learn From Our Dreams?

Recently I've been dealing with the loss of a loved one and not understanding why she left things the way she did.  For whatever reason during her last few years on this earth she became bitter and unapproachable.  Following her death I learned that she had changed her will from passing everything onto the family to selling everything and giving the money away.  While there were many things of value, there were also priceless items such as photos that were all thrown away by those who received her personal property.  Upon talking to neighbors, I now know that these were indeed her dying wishes and not a result of coercion.  I've been calling upon everyone I know looking for answers but finally last night I had a dream that somehow made everything clear.  So just what are our dreams?

Subconscious working overtime?

Spiritual Guidance?

Repressed Memories?

Snapshots from our daily routine?

Perhaps the deceased form of communication?

Inheritance - What did you get from your relative?

Recently, my Grandmother passed away and as I would soon discover, she did not follow my Grandfather's wishes as they had been explained to me many times while he was living. The land that he had worked so hard to farm was left to some distant cousins of mine instead of me (the next descending heir). For a few days I felt left out, disappointed, heart-broken, etc. What followed was nothing short of an awakening. Dave Ramsey often quotes scripture that translates to "a good man leaves an inheritance for his children's children". So had my Grandmother in fact destroyed his legacy? Had she been persuaded to pass along riches to the "other side" of the family? The answer is quite simply, no. What she did was realize that I had gotten all the wealth I need from them to carry on the tradition. While I may not have been left her diamonds or his land, they both gave me knowledge that nobody can take away from me. That knowledge will allow me to leave my own legacy, while the material possessions can be sold by those they were given to allow them to do the same.

So just what did I learn? Too many things to list but some of them are as follows:

1) Make hay while the sun shines. What does this mean exactly? Work when you are able to do so. My grandfather worked every single hour of overtime offered to him during his 30+ year career. My Grandma did the same. In the 50s and 60s when it was nearly unheard of for a woman to work, she worked long shifts in a factory. She also walked to work nearly 3 miles because they never saw the need for two vehicles.

2) Whenever possible, be self sufficient. My grandparents also had a small farm, grew their own tomatoes, onions, corn, strawberries, pumpkins, etc while also raising their own pigs and chickens. What they couldn't provide, they traded for with other local farmers and sold the rest.

3) Pay cash for everything. My Grandpa never carried a credit card in his life. Even the house he paid for in cash. He saved up and worked for 12 years to build their home and even then he built it himself with friends. Once again he traded work on the things he knew for the things he didn't.

4) Spend some of your wealth on those you love. Now you would never know it to look at them but my Grandma had an impressive collection of diamonds. My Grandpa always spoiled my Grandma whenever he had the opportunity to do so. While diamonds are not a requirement to show you care, they are forever, as they say.

5) Teach your children about money. Whenever I wanted something, a true want not a need. Grandpa would offer to help. Helping meant that you would save up half and he would pay the other half. This taught us the meaning of working for things and that he wasn't going to just give you money. He had worked hard for what he had and he was teaching you to do the same.

6) You can't take it with you. My grandpa always lived by the philosophy of wanting to see his descendants prosper while he was alive. He always said that he wanted to see us happy while he could. Whenever possible, he would buy us all dinner or treat us to ice cream, etc.

7) Always help others but don't just give them things. My Grandpa worked on the railroad for most of his adult life. During that time he became known as the man who would help all the "hobos". They would always ask for money and he would always tell them no. He would gladly buy them a hot meal, help them find some local work or whatever was necessary but never just hand a stranger cash.

8) It always comes back tenfold. I saw firsthand as well as heard stories of my Grandpa helping others. He saved at least three lives during his career and one of them was even a man who had stolen from him. A lesser man wouldn't have been so kind. He always said though that whatever you give, you get back tenfold and he knew it to be true. He always gave to the local church as well as food to the needy.

9) Build it yourself. Anything my Grandpa built was so heavy that only he could lift it was a running joke in my family for years. He overbuilt everything and as a result never replaced it. When he made something it was solid oak or some other solid wood that was strong enough to park a car on it.

10) Learn from your mistakes as well as the mistakes of others. Most of these principles are not new and were not his own but he always had open eyes and quickly taught himself.